Thursday, November 20, 2008

A lazy man's post.



I've never done one of these memes before, mostly because of #37, but they also remind me of those giggling sex surveys we passed around in middle school (Have you kissed? With tongue?) that taught me how to lie boldly and without shame.

But someone sent this to me and I thought it might amuse while I recover.

So, here ya go:

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Yes, King David of the Bible. (Actually, I don't have any idea.)
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? This morning when I woke up and realized I had not been embraced by sweet sweet death while I slept
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I prefer cutting letters out of a magazine and pasting them onto the note paper
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Long pig
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Unfortunately for my daughter, yes
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Only if I could lend me money
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Me? Sarcasm?
8.. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS No, I donated them to science.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Depends. Which, coincidentally, is what I would wear to bungee jump.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Shredded wheat
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I let the nurse do it.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? My strength lies in sarcasm.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Pistachio
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? If they look like they could lend me money.
15. RED OR PINK? Red, as in Commie Red.
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? What day is today?
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My father.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Only if their answers are revealing, entertaining or embarrassing.
19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Red, as in Commie Red.
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A banana.
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? My clock ticking.
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Red, as in …
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? Baby heads.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Pete, our mechanic.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? I’m madly in like with the person who sent this to me.
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Porn.
27. HAIR COLOR? Elvis black.
28. EYE COLOR? Red, as in….
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No.
30. FAVORITE FOOD? I am Omnivore, see me consume.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Depends. Which is what I wear watching scary movies.
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Detour.
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Faded purple.
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer.
35. HUGS OR KISSES? Inappropriate touching.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Vodka tonics.
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? People with too much time on their hands.
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Reverse of #37.
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Charlie Opera by our friend, Charlie Stella.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? A mouse.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? The Daily Show.
42. FAVORITE SOUND? Childrens’ laughter.
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Depends. (Make your own geezer joke here)
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Bolivia.
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? I have an amazing ability to annoy people.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Donora, Pennsylvania, a steel town with air so toxic it killed 19 people on Halloween night, 1948.
47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Surprise me.

2 comments:

Jeff Shelby said...

1. No
2. August. Daughter's first day of kindergarten.
3. Yes
4. Roast beef
5. Yes. The aforementioned daughter.
6. I think so. I would not be friends with Jim Born, though.
7. Yes
8. Yes. A doctor once told me they are the largest he'd ever seen that had not been removed.
9. Probably not
10. Captain Crunchberries
11. Almost never
12. No. If someone ever gets trapped under a car and they are depending on me, they are seriously screwed.
13. Peanut butter and chocolate
14. Whether or not they look like they are about to assault me.
15. Red
16. My compulsion to fill out memes.
17. A friend from elementary school.
18. God no.
19. Barefoot at the moment
20. Toast
21. The wind
22. Midnight Blue
23. Chocolate chip cookies
24. Eva at the pediatrician's office
25. Yes and I don't see him nearly often enough - but he's always looking at me like he wants to borrow money...
26. Basketball and baseball and soccer played by 5 yr olds.
27. Brown
28. Blue
29. I've tried 'em, but they don't work.
30. The chorizo omelette at The Blue Goose.
31. Happy endings
32. Get Smart
33. Dark gray
34. Summer
35. Kisses
36. Creme brulee
37. People avoiding other things
38. Gainfully employed people
39. City of Bones by Michael Connelly
40. My daughter's soccer team
41. Top Chef
42. My daughter's giggle
43. Stones
44. Key West
45. I can juggle. See how far that's gotten me?
46. Torrance, CA - April 4, 1970
47. I'll read every single one. Unfortunately.

norby said...

1. Yes, Deborah in the Bible, so it's not my fault I'm judgemental.
2. Hmmm, some point in my divorce process I think.
3. When I can read it.
4. I try to avoid lunch meat-it's overprocessed.
5. Hell no.
6. Probably out of pity.
7. Oh yeah.
8. Yes.
9. Hell no.
10. Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch
11. No, just kick them off.
12. Strong how? Overall, probably.
13. Coffee.
14. Eyes.
15. Red, as in blood.
16. My absolute need for control-you will obey!!!
17. My aunt and grandfather.
18. Am I sending this to anyone?
19. White, orange, and grey sneakers.
20. Dbl. cheeseburger and fries.
21. Law & Order: CI
22. Something odd.
23. Smells? Anything that isn't rotting.
24. My sister Laura.
25. I'm on your website aren't I?
26. Baseball or rugby
27. Natural brown, preferred red.
28. Hazel.
29. Hell no, I'm not putting my fingers near my eyes.
30. Steak and potatoes.
31. Scary movies-true scary, not gore-fests.
32. Actually watched, not had on while I did homework? No idea.
33. Burgundy Bel-Rea scrub shirt.
34. Winter.
35. Kisses.
36. Ice Cream.
37. Beats me.
38. Ditto.
39. Demons by Bill Pronzini.
40. Don't have a mouse pad-using a laptop.
41. Ghosthunters.
42. Music from my mp3 player.
43. Beatles
44. Midleton, Co. Cork, Ireland.
45. I have somehow encouraged a nineteen year old girl to become extremely competitive with me regarding our grades. Does that count as a talent?
46. Monroe, LA.
47. Come on people, Shelby and I were brave...