Because then we might have a shortage of H1N1 vaccine.
OK, sure, we have people who can't get the vaccine here too, but at least we're not evil like Canada.
Know who jumps to the front of the line in the Great White North? Pregnant women? Children? Geezers?
Nope. Hockey players. That's right. Hockey players got their shots before any of those other, non-hockey people who clutter up Canada's socialist clinics.
And that would never happen here. Here, the vaccine goes to the people who need it most. Like Wall Street bankers.
Meanwhile, someone was fired for giving the hockey players preference, proving that our health care system is nothing like Canada's. Because nothing like that would ever happen here. That's called accountability and it's right up there with socialism as a nonstarter.
On a side note, Happy Veteran's Day to everyone who stood up, raised your right hand and served your nation. I'm honored to be in such distinguished company.
And to all the chickenhawks who let another mother's child take your place in line, go fuck yourself. I'm looking at you, Mr. Cheney. I'm looking at you.