Monday, May 04, 2009

Let's take a closer look at Miss California's breasts.

Pretty impressive, right? As it turns out, these are some of the best breasts money can buy.

Carrie Prejean aka Miss California, has been in the news lately because she said, “...We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman..." pissing off gay men, a beauty pageant's biggest audience block, and admitting to the rest of America that she is an inarticulate bigot.

But that's not what interested me about Miss Prejean. After all, what's one more floating turd of vacuous blather compared to the river of poo that Hannity, Limbaugh, Beck and Doocy pass every day?

No, another empty-headed beauty queen making Republicans all tingly in their nether bits is hardly worth a mention. But when the news focuses on her store-bought Winnebagos, that's when I take notice.

Last week, Keith Lewis, the co-Director of the Miss California Pageant, appeared on a network news show and admitted he helped our plucky contestant get a new front-end alignment.

When newsbabe Maggie Rodriguez asked why, Lewis said it was to give Prejean confidence because, as we all know, women can't possibly be confident without big tits. Then the interview turned to other ways of looking confident without having to beg skeezy pageant people to pay for your new knockers.

"Many of the girls use chicken cutlets," Lewis said.

Wow. I'll never look at chicken cutlets the same way ever again. Or breasts, for that matter.

And the questions arise: How does that work? Does it make a girl smell like poultry?Can you eat the cutlets afterward? If a gentlemen nuzzled your breast, as gentlemen are wont to do, could he contract salmonella? Would veal cutlets work? What does PETA think about using our feathered friends to enhance a beauty contestant's cleavage?

As we ponder these and other pressing questions of the day, let's use this opportunity to check out Miss Prejean's hooters again.

They're pretty nice, you have to admit. But probably not nice enough to win over all her former fans.


Gerard said...

Are gay men won over by a great rack? Because that chick has a great rack.

charlie stella said...

She may not be an intellectual, but she also may not be a bigot, Dave.

I did think what Perez Hilton said about her deserved teeth extraction but that's just the dad in me (i.e., if it was my daughter Perez would be gumming his next meal).

And lord knows I don't agree with her ... but bigot might be a touch on the side of overkill.

David Terrenoire said...


If she stood on that stage and said she was against interracial marriage, that would make her a bigot.

I don't see the difference.

But I agree with you on that asshole Hilton. What a repulsive POS.

Phoebe Fay said...

I've had some experience with being a girl, and I've seen a lot of ways to bamboozle with boobage, but I've never ever EVER heard of using chicken cutlets.

Ew. Just ew.

As for Miss Prejean, she is vapid and uninformed and shows no inclination to get herself informed, which may not, in and of itself, make her a bigot, but it does put her on a path to bigotry.

charlie stella said...

Bigot is a broad generalization ... people intolerable of any differing opinion ... does that make the left (or the right) bigots for being intolerable of each other?

Maybe, but I doubt it.

I think you can be against something without being a bigot, even interracial marriage. I might not understand why, but I don't think everyone against interracial marriage or gay marriage are bigots.

By your definitions, most of the Democratic Party (including our President) are bigots (against gay marriages). Don't forget he spoke out against gay marriage in front of much more important audience than Miss America viewers.

I don't think for a second Obama is a bigot.

Gerard Saylor said...

"Chicken cutlets" are not real chicken cutlets. That is the name given to the silicon (or something) inserts women can stick in a bra.

David Terrenoire said...


Your point is well-taken. Perhaps I'm a bit hard on a person I don't really know. But I would argue that, based on this statement and what I think I know about Obama, his position is based on honest consideration for what is right and what is possible and her position is one of a knee-jerk, ill-considered intolerance.

I view this as a civil rights issue and so much of what I hear from the right are just recycled arguments bigots used for years to deny equal protection to racial minorities. That's why I think "bigot" when I hear people like Miss CA speak.

But I could be wrong. It's happened before.

charlie stella said...

You could be wrong?

Join the club ... I voted for George Bush ... twice.

It still stings just to type that.

charlie stella said...

Then again, the only reason I voted for Bush was the Democratic Party and how it had shortchanged me at every turn … which I still feel it has done and why I’ll probably never vote for either party ever again; one proved outright criminal and the other reconfirmed its uselessness.

I’ll continue to waste my future votes on Ralph Nader (or someone like him) and hope enough others are frustrated by the “Change” rhetoric to give up once and for all on the two parties that remain loyal to Wall Street, inequality and one-way socialism.

JD Rhoades said...

Look, I think the woman's an airhead, and her position intolerant and wrong.

But am I the only one that's uncomfortable with someone going on TV and revealing that she has breast implants? What purpose does that serve but to embarrass her personally? You want to argue the gay marriage issue, g'head, but leave the poor tits out of it. They didn't do anything wrong.

charlie stella said...

Is it the angle of the pictures or is one older than the other?

Because she sure looks somewhat racked in the top picture and somewhat flatter in the bottom picture ... and I know from a prior wife's augmentation (I love big words) that those babies (implants) always stand at attention.

deangc said...

I think it's just the flat fill light in the second shot. If you look closely, you'll see the line indicating the edge of the implant: real tits flow smoothly from the breastbone. These have a little transition zone that is not quite natural. They're standing proud, but they're compressed by the bikini top and the flat lighting reduces the side modeling.

I love the crazed expression she has in the first photo. She looks like a raving California zealot.

And, goddammait, my word verification word is 'cussers'.

charlie stella said...

As it turns out, Obambi did once support gay marriage ... back when he was in (or running for) the Senate (12 years ago).

I guess that makes him more a politicians than honest and I'm not sure that's necessarily better than the beauty contestant.

I still doubt he (or she) is a bigot, but dishonest? No doubt in my mind who's more dishonest.