Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Now they tell me

If I'd known about the Long Ridge Writers Group, I could have saved years of rejection and unsold manuscripts.

See that smiling woman over there? She's Karen O'Connor, author of Getting Old Is Not For Wimps: Inspirations and Stories to Warm Your Heart and Tickle Your Funny Bone which may be the longest book title in history and is sure to go straight to the top of my TBR pile.

Karen is just one of the instructors at Breaking Into Print, which sounds illegal, but probably isn't. Since I want to write inspirations and stories that warm hearts and tickle funnybones, I'm going to take the free test to see if I have what it takes to break into print instead of into my neighbors' homes while they're at work.

At first, I thought I had to sketch Karen, like I sketched the Art School turtle, but apparently not, which is a good thing as the Art School took out a restraining order. Besides, Karen looks like she could probably take me in a fair fight.

So I'm sending off for the test, a brochure introducing me to my 30 instructors, plus a booklet asking "Do You Make These Common Mistakes In Writing?"

You mean like starting a blog? We'll see.

Stay tuned and we'll take the test together. Could be fun and instructive.


M. G. Tarquini said...

Looking forward to the test, David. I've an awful feeling that the worst of my common writing mistakes is opening the word processing program.

David Terrenoire said...

Ha! Very funny, m.g.

I loved your post about Goldwater's photography. They showed some it in the doc and you're right, he was really good. Beautiful stuff. Who knew?

Sandra Ruttan said...

Ah, you can't top Mindy for humour.

You want to write inspirations and stories that warm hearts and tickle funnybones?

Dear GOD, you want to be a cozy writer.

M. G. Tarquini said...

Ah, you can't top Mindy for humour.

Good Lord, I hope not! Me trying to do it for a living and all...well, forget for a living, just to get published.

Yeah. Who knew about Goldwater? Everybody has their story, some different side of him. He wielded his camera with an artist's eye for light and a poet's feel for composition.

There's a little memorial in his honor down the street from me. Takes up several acres of prime Paradise Valley Real Estate.

People feel bad because when his house got sold (A sprawling fifties thing with magnificent views of the city), the guy who bought it, a very secret guy who bought it through several corporations and more lawyers swore to all that is holy that he wouldn't tear it down, would just upgrade it and preserve it's basic style and do so in a tasteful manner. He did that to get the family to sign. The day after he took ownership, the bulldozers rolled in.

Stupid really, the family could have donated it, made it an Arizona landmark. It's not like they needed the money. Sometimes I wonder if that's the reason John McCain has his for sale - save everybody the trouble of considering it a shrine.

Anonymous said...

Afraid Ed Vega still has the lock on longest title: "No Matter How Much You Promise to Cook or Pay the Rent You Blew It Cauze Bill Bailey Ain't Never Coming Home Again; A Symphonic Novel"