Friday, March 07, 2008

The Planet's Asshole of the Week.

It's been a full week of contenders. From Hillary's "as far as I know" moment to the collected neocons spending 3 trillion dollars of our money just to make Iraq safe for the president of Iran.

Here, after actual moments of thought, are the nominees for Asshole of the Week.

President Bush channels his inner Ashlee Simpson. At least when he's dancing, he's not telling us about all the things we have to understand. Yes, George, we know. It's hard work.

Tom Friedman. Watch for his eloquent Suck. On. This. moment in this clip. You know, this guy's made a ton of money by being wrong about Iraq. Maybe he'll kick in a few million, just because. I once respected this guy. I must have been drunk.

The unknown asshole who shot Eve Carson. The piece of human detritus who murdered the student body president of UNC took a life of great promise. Anyone want to bet that when they catch this punk, he'll be a total waste of oxygen?

The unknown asshole who bombed a recruiting office in Times Square. Hey, pal, you want to protest war and the military, isn't it ironic you that you blow shit up to do it? Jesus, what an asshole.

But the Asshole of the Week Award goes to the Palestinians who celebrated the murder of eight divinty students this week. How much of an asshole do you have to be to dance over the shooting of innocents? Apparently, these guys know.

Happy Friday, Planeteers. May your weekend be completely devoid of people like this.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

$25K for Eve Carson's killer? That's all this town can offer? Way not enough for the roaches to come out tonight. There's plenty enough money around here to make it worthwhile.

And here's someone who would've made an actual difference.