Blogger said no more pictures right now, I don't know why. So here's my first report on Thrillerfest:
I didn't have a very good time in Phoenix. Anyone who was there can tell you I spent most of the time sulking in my room, watching movies at $87 a pop, drinking from the mini bar and sobbing uncontrollably.
Why? Well, as Dusty Rhoades called the recent unpleasantness, the only reason my novel was nominated for a Thriller was because of my gender, and as I didn't win, that can only mean my manhood was insufficient to take home the trophy. Apparently, Adam Fawer swings a bigger hammer than I do.
So to speak.
The truth is, I can't remember having a better time, which should tell you a lot about how I spent my 20's, and I was surprised by how little I did care about winning. Don't get me wrong, winning is good. I like winning. I even like winning awards because as anyone who has ever been awarded a shiny geegaw for Employee of the Week can tell you, winning is better than losing. But I was disappointed for about ninety seconds, and then Stephen Blackmoore brought me a drink and all was right again. Congratulations, Adam, and to Will Staeger, Mark Gimenez and especially to Stuart MacBride, your work made being considered for this award a genuine honor. How I ever made it into your company has always seemed a fluke.
And I suspect someone at Thrillerfest had the good sense to realize that me, a microphone and an open bar could not possibly add up to anything good.
I promised myself I'd drop as many names as possible so here goes.
People I was happy to see again, in no particular order:
Fred Rea. Fred's one of the few people I can talk to about the relative merits of the Makarov 9 mm vs the parabellum and he actually gives a damn.
David Montgomery. I like David. I like decent guys. David is a decent guy.
Sandy Balzo. Sandy kicked my ass in the Derringer Awards, making it easier to accept this loss. She's also a beautiful, smart, funny and incredibly generous writer.
Michele Martinez. Speaking of beautiful and talented, Michele is another person it's always good to see, because I know that if I stay on her good side, there's a smaller chance I'll be brought up on federal charges.
Gayle Linds. Gayle probably couldn't pick me out of a lineup, but she taught me a lot about writing a thriller.
Zoe Sharp. There are some women who just ooze class and charm, even when firing off a few belts through a Squad Automatic Weapon.
Joe Finder. Joe has never shooed me away, no matter how annoying I became, and I really did like Company Man.
Joe Konrath. Joe is a wonder, a whirling dynamo of entertainment. I'm a sucker for anyone who makes me laugh, and as some of you know, it's very difficult to make me laugh. Uh-huh.
Dusty Rhoades. I wish he'd stop following me around. People are beginning to talk.
People I wish had been at Thrillerfest:
Stuart MacBride, Ray Banks, Al Guthrie, Duane Swierczynski, Tasha Alexander, Byron Quertermous, Olen Steinhauer, Kevin Wignall, Josh Stallings, and there are more, I'm sure, that I'll think of as I write more.
Embarrassing updates: Oh, how about Jeff Shelby? Damn. And Sandra Ruttan. John Rickards and James Lincoln Warren. I consider John's absence the reason I didn't win.
In my next post, I'll mention all those people I met for the first time. Some I knew from blogs, some people were new to me. All of them made last weekend a great time.
More to come.
I didn't read this post. I only read blogs of winners.
Glad you had a good time. And I can't believe Fred was there - I had the pleasure of Fred's company at Sleuthfest this year and I'm totally bummed I missed a chance to hang out with him again.
But not Rhoades. Tired of that guy.
Were you keeping with the sexist theme when you only listed men you wished had been there?
Happy Fourth David.
If you've ever seen Tasha, you'd know she's definitely not a man.
(I knew trying to list everyone was a bad idea. Bad David, Bad, bad, David)
Damn, somehow I missed her.
No worries David - I think with all these allegations floating around lately, some have confused sexist with sexy. If I was making a list, it would be almost all men too.
Well geez, David, glad I was so memorable. (kidding) It was great meeting you and next time, I'll buy a round and we'll get a chance to talk a little longer.
David, it's an honor to be listed. I'm thrilled that you noticed I wasn't there.
You'll be at Bouchercon, right???
No B'con this year, Tasha. I won't have a book out and I just can't afford to go, as much as I'd like to.
Maybe the one after that.
Winning doesn't matter, David, as long as you're a major bestseller.
At this point, Joe, I'm still worling on being a minor bestseller.
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